The Notebook
by Queens of Gondor
Summary: Random stuff from random things, let us know how you like it!!! WE'RE BACK, WITH A VENGANCE, LIKE DIE HARD!
1. Default Chapter

Commodous-No! you can't marry him!  
  
Nora-Why?  
  
Commodous-I love him! (starts a cat with Nora) take that! (throws a pathetic punch) and that! (tries to slap her)  
  
Maximus- Stop! There's enough Maximus for everyone! (kisses them both)  
  
Commodous- (blushes and in a girly voice) Oh Maximus! (giggles) (turns to Maximus) Kiss me you fool!  
  
Maximus- Ok!  
  
(They all have a party)  
  
Commodous-Maximus, have I ever told you have how GREAT you look in a skirt?  
  
Maximus- Only a million times baby! (starts to do can-can)  
  
(then Christina Agulera runs in) "ooooo Lady Marmilade"  
  
(Suddenly the Indiana Jones theme song begins)  
  
Indy- Hello everyone, has the party started already?  
  
(Abby swings in on whip)  
  
Abby- Indy I love that hat!  
  
Indy- well I do look good in it...ooh look shrimp!  
  
(walks over to buffet table)  
  
Abby- you insensitive, good looking man!  
  
Indy- Damn straight!  
  
Abby- I hate you soooo much, I could kiss you!  
  
Indy- (with shrimp in his mouth) Let's kiss!  
  
(EWWWW!)  
  
Nora- Hello? Remember me?  
  
Maximus- no  
  
Nora- then this will help you remember (smooches him on lips)  
  
Maximus- WOW! I hate you Commodus!  
  
Commodus- Noooo! (runs to women's bathroom to cry)  
  
Joe- Did I miss anything?  
  
Izzy- Ooh man!  
  
Nora- JYOUSHRIO!  
  
Joe- huh? You know about that? IZZY!  
  
Izzy- (blushes) what? I wanted to declare my love for you!  
  
Joe- Shut up and kiss me you computer freak! (smooches him)  
  
Izzy- Ooh I love your blue hair!  
  
Indy- I don't feel too good  
  
Abby- stop eating shrimp  
  
(Suddenly Yolei and Mimi enter)  
  
Yolei and Mimi- WE'RE LESIBAINS! (they leave)  
  
Abby- well that was random  
  
Nora- that's my saying!  
  
(Indy spots BBQ chicken)  
  
Indy- Chicken!  
  
Abby- Some girls have all the luck and I get stuck with him  
  
Nora- well my guy's got a secret boyfriend who tired to kill him on numerous occasions  
  
Izzy- all I got was blue hair  
  
Joe- I thought you liked my blue hair!  
  
Izzy- but I do sweetheart...(smooches him)  
  
(Joe giggles)  
  
Indy- Ooh buffalo wings!  
  
Abby- would you please stop eating??  
  
Maximus- Oim Maaaximus and Oim a farrrmer  
  
Nora- I think we had already come to that conclusion  
  
Hermione- What are we doing here?  
  
Harry- I dunno, oh no! What're you doing here?  
  
Malfoy- Potter, what're you doing here?  
  
Ron- We dunno, what're you doing here?  
  
Malfoy- cruising for chicos  
  
Abby- Chicos?  
  
Malfoy- Yeah, you know chicos, hombres, guys, etc  
  
Hermione- Oh my god!  
  
Ron- I knew you were gay!  
  
Malfoy-Damn it! How did you know?  
  
Ron - The ferret was too frisky around Moody  
  
(Harry starts throwing up)  
  
Malfoy- honey, are you ok?  
  
Harry- ahhhhh! (starts throwing up again)  
  
Indy- (whispers to Abby, Nora, and Maximus) what are they talking about?  
  
Commodus-Well I think the black haired kid is grossed out by the blonde kid.  
  
Nora- and I think the red-head is hot!  
  
Maximus- What about me?!  
  
Nora-well you can use "Just for Men" gel to get his gorgeous hair!  
  
Maximus-hmmmmm...(runs to CVS)  
  
(later.....)  
  
Maximus-hey Indy, you wanna help me dye my hair red?  
  
Indy-um, ok, why?  
  
Maximus-cause I wanna  
  
Indy-alright, alright  
  
Ron-everybody lover me.  
  
Hermione-Shut up! Oh my God! Look at Malfoy!  
  
Malfoy- it's ok Commodus I love you  
  
Commodus- oh well, forget about Maximus.  
  
Harry- well he found his chico!  
  
Ron- oh ewwwww! (throws up)  
  
Indy-why are those kids still here?  
  
Maximus-wouldn't it be past their bed time?  
  
Abby- yeah. Hey kids!  
  
Harry-we're not kids! We're 14!  
  
Abby-whatever, go away!  
  
Harry-shut up!  
  
Abby-you shut up!  
  
Harry-you shut up!  
  
Nora- will the two of you just shut hell up!  
  
Abby and Nora-NO!  
  
(Nora rolls eyes)  
  
(suddenly Joe and Izzy kiss)  
  
SMOOCH!!  
  
(Abby and Harry stop fighting)  
  
Harry-let's get out of here!  
  
(Harry, Ron and Hermione run away in terror)  
  
Joe-They just don't get it.  
  
Izzy-oh well, kiss me!  
  
(They start smooching again)  
  
Indy- Good idea! (smooches Abby)  
  
Maximus-Hey! (smooches Nora)  
  
Commodus- No one loves me, not even my father!, sob!  
  
(Suddenly Malfoy comes in and smooches him)  
  
if you liked, tell us! More where that came from!!! 


	2. the next chapter

Abby- BUBBLES!  
  
Indy-woah…  
  
Maximus-I like bubbles, look, (blows bubbles) BUBBLES!  
  
Indy- you all have an overdose on Tylenol!  
  
Nora-yup! That would explain it, LOOK! (blows bubbles off her tongue)  
  
Maximus and Indy- that's gross!  
  
Nora- no it's funny! HAHAHA!  
  
Abby-I agree with the guys  
  
Nora-SPIT BUBBLES!!!!!!!  
  
Indy-oh my favorite song  
  
Maximus-POGLET!  
  
Nora-don't you just love the randomness?!  
  
Commodus-I'm back and with a vengeance!  
  
Nora and Abby- gay fag, leave!  
  
Commodus-there's nothing wrong with my gayitivity.  
  
Nora and Abby- Gayitivity?  
  
Maximus-is that a word? This guy's messed up.  
  
Indy-you got that right dress boy  
  
Maximus-it's not a dress, it's a skirt.  
  
Indy-whatever you freak.  
  
Maximus-at least I don't wear a stupid hat!  
  
Indy-don't diss my hat!  
  
(Maximus throws sword through it)  
  
Maximus-that's what I think of your hat!  
  
(Indy pulls sword out of hat and slashes Maximus' belt and his skirt falls down)  
  
Indy- so it is a skirt  
  
Maximus-it was a birthday present from Commodus…..  
  
Nora-hey, nice under tunic  
  
(Maximus goes red and pulls up his skirt)  
  
Maximus- heh heh, well I need a new belt.  
  
Indy- (singing) Maximus wears a skirt, Maximus wears a skirt.  
  
Maximus-(tears on his eyes) Shut up!  
  
Abby-(whispers to Nora) Gee, I didn't know your guy was so sensitive.  
  
Nora-well, he fought tigers last week and that was tough.  
  
Abby-yeah  
  
Indy-ha ha!  
  
Maximus- shut up! (pulls out dagger and slashes at Indy's belt, Indy's pants fall down) Who's laughing now?  
  
(Indy is wearing pink boxers with little lavender ponies)  
  
Abby- oh my God! (starts rolling on the floor with laughter)  
  
Nora- (catches her breath) this----is----getting-----ugly.  
  
Abby- these guys must be imposternaters, oh by the way, that's made up.  
  
Nora- wash your mouth out with acid!  
  
Commodus-(runs in) stop fighting over me! I know I'm beautiful!  
  
Max and Indy-Ewww gross!  
  
Abby- I thought we told you to leave!  
  
Commodus- but they love me  
  
Max and Indy- no we don't!  
  
Nora- umm, well you guys get some pants? Wait a minute, what am I saying! Maximus, don't put on your pans, skirt, whatever! Indy, uh, your boxers are kinda weird, um please put on your pants.  
  
Abby- are you dissing my guy?  
  
Nora- no! of course not!  
  
Abby- well I am! Pink! Indy what are you thinking!?  
  
Indy- well I like lavender ponies…  
  
Nora- woah  
  
Maximus- who's manlier now?  
  
Indy- between the two of us I think it'd be Commodus.  
  
Commodus- so you do love me!  
  
Indy-no (takes out his gun)  
  
Commodus- oh dear, um please don't kill me…  
  
Indy- too late for that, honey. (fires gun in slow motion)  
  
Maximus- (in slow motion) NO-O-O-O-O-O-O! (jumps in front of Commodus)  
  
Nora-Maximus!  
  
Maximus- oww, that bullet hurts more than a sword.  
  
Commodus-you saved me! I knew you loved me!  
  
Maximus- uh, no. Oh man.  
  
Nora-Maximus! Someone call an ambulance!  
  
Commodus- honey, you'll be ok!  
  
Nora- get away from him!  
  
Commodus- he loves me!  
  
Nora-no he doesn't  
  
Rudy- you're all freaks.  
  
All- Rudy? Where did you come from?  
  
Rudy- I don't know  
  
Jerry- I hate Colby!  
  
Rudy- who cares?  
  
Richard- (spots Indy) helloooo there…  
  
Indy- oh my God, why do all these queers like me?  
  
Abby- because you're gorgeous!  
  
Indy- well that's ok from you but…  
  
Rich- I like those boxers!  
  
Indy- oh damn! (pulls up his pants)  
  
Rich- lavender ponies are so in!  
  
Nora-umm, is that ambulance coming?  
  
Abby- yeah, I called them  
  
Nora- ok (spots the Survivors) oh my God! Richard! Rudy! You're my heroes!  
  
Rudy- oh my God  
  
Rich- Cool, someone admires me.  
  
Nora-can I have your autographs?  
  
Rudy-why not? (signs papers)  
  
Rich- yeah (signs paper)  
  
Indy- LOOK OUT! LUNGEE HAWK! (great pink spit comes from sky)  
  
Rich- hey boxer boy, you match now!  
  
Abby- ewwwwwwwwwwwwww ( gets hit with great pink spit) AHHHHHH!  
  
Nora-ha ha! (gets hit with spit)  
  
Maximus- kiss my butt, love Russell.  
  
Nora and Commodus- with pleasure!  
  
(Maximus farts)  
  
Abby and Indy- Crowe passes next to Scanlan  
  
Nora- Russell Crowe is hot  
  
Crowe passes over Scanlan  
  
I love him so much  
  
A haiku by me.  
  
Brendan- I am Brendan Fraiser!  
  
Jonathan- and I am Jonathan, 'ello!  
  
Imophotep- and I am Imotab, I don't know how to spell my own name!  
  
Abby-see I'm not the only one who can't spell  
  
Gore- lock box  
  
Weakest Link Person- you are the Weakest Link!  
  
All- GOOD BYE!  
  
Indy- they are all insane, let's try to sneak out of here. (Whispers to Nora, Abby, and Maximus) (They nod)  
  
(Suddenly millions of fangirls run in screaming)  
  
Fangirl #1-Matt! Matt! (Looks around) Where is he?!  
  
Fangirl #2- There! (Runs over to him)  
  
(Fangirls pick him up and carries him away)  
  
Matt- AHHHH! Get away from me!  
  
(Fangirl #3 spots Indy and Maximus)  
  
Find out what happens to Indy and Maximus in later chapters of……The Notebook! 


	3. the one after the next chapter

Fangirl #3- OH MY GOD! It's them!  
  
(All fangirls run over and surround Indy and Maximus)  
  
Matt- thanks guys…HA HA! (tries to make a run for it but fangirl #1ropes him in)  
  
Fangirl #1- not so fast hot stuff.  
  
(fangirls surround Indy and Maximus)  
  
Indy-this isn't good  
  
Maximus- really?  
  
Abby-get away from him! he's taken!  
  
Nora-go away!  
  
Fangirl #4- Get them! (ties Nora and Abby to a tree) Grab the hotties!  
  
Indy and Maximus-Nooooo! (they get tied up)  
  
Indy- this really isn't good  
  
Maximus- so you call yourself smart! HA!  
  
Abby- (yells) Help us! (whispers to Nora) Men…  
  
Nora-tell me about it.  
  
(the leader of the Fangirl tribe emerges…it's Jun!)  
  
Jun- Finally, now I've got you, you hotties!  
  
Matt-not Jun! NOOO!  
  
(Fangirls bow before her)  
  
Fangirl #2-almighty, number 1 fangirl! It's good to have you back.  
  
Jun- yes, well we better get on with the ritual.  
  
Indy- ritual?  
  
Fangirl #3- the sacrifices are ready.  
  
Maximus-sacrifices?  
  
Fangirl #2- soon they will all become the hottest guy on the planet.  
  
Matt- what?  
  
Jun- bring them to the temple, the Lost Temple of Ishda.  
  
(Indiana Jones theme starts)  
  
Indy- huh? Am I supposed to do something?  
  
Matt-no, it's for me.  
  
Indy- but I'm Indiana Jones!  
  
Matt- yeah, but if adventure has a name it must be Indiana Matt.  
  
Indy- they stole that from me!  
  
Matt- I'm Indiana Matt!  
  
Maximus- one problem, we're still tied up! You Indiana Idiot!  
  
(Indiana Jones music suddenly stops)  
  
(A huge fire pit emerges from the ground)  
  
Fangirl #4- once we throw them in there, they will melt together and form the hottest man alive!  
  
Indy- hey, wait, this is like my movie…  
  
Maximus- oh great! I feel much better now.  
  
Indy- Mr. Lucas, I think we should cut this scene.  
  
Maximus- one problem Indy, this isn't a movie set!  
  
Indy- oh yeah, I forgot (blushes)  
  
Fangirl #2-put them on the platform!  
  
Maximus- (starts crying) nooooooo, please, no!  
  
(they tie them to stakes on a wooden platform, which is raised above the fire pit)  
  
Matt- oh man, where's Tai when I need him?  
  
Jonathan- don't know who Tai is chap, but I guess I'm here.  
  
Max and Indy and Matt- Jonathan!  
  
Jonathan- yup, I'm here to save you! (hits a random fangirl with a fly swatter)  
  
Matt- oh great, a fly swatter!  
  
Jonathan- don't diss the fly swatter! (hits another fangirl)  
  
Fangirl- ow!  
  
Jonathan- subtle, yet effective (hits another) now to save you! (jumps on platform as it rises) here is my special Gold Stick thing!  
  
Matt- hey, a gold stick!  
  
Brendan- it's a spear!  
  
Jonathan- it doesn't look like a spear!  
  
Nora- (to Abby) Learn to spell!  
  
Abby- leave me alone!  
  
Nora- (to Jun) you are the weakest link, good bye! (pushes her into the pit)  
  
Jun- ahhhhhhhh! It (blinks) doesn't burn.  
  
Nora- ahhh! She is Satan!  
  
Matt- this is getting worse and worse!  
  
Maximus- yeah  
  
Indy- use the spear!  
  
Jonathan- it doesn't look like a spear…  
  
Brendan- shut up and give it to me ( he makes the thing into the spear and hits the rope, they're untied)  
  
Indy- yay!  
  
Jonathan- ooh, I didn't save the day (looks down at the ground)  
  
Abby- it's ok.  
  
Jonathan- huh?  
  
Nora- never mind (Jonathan whacks her with the fly swatter) what was that for!?  
  
Jonathan- (shrugs) I dunno, I guess I just like hitting people.  
  
Matt- umm, Jun's still alive.  
  
Indy- yeah (takes out gun)  
  
Maximus- can't you think of anything more creative?  
  
Indy- if we had more time, but, hey! Guess what!…we don't!  
  
Maximus- fine then (pulls out sword) one, two, three!  
  
(throws sword and Indy fires gun in slow motion)  
  
Jun- nooo! ARGH! (the bullet hits her in the stomach while the sword slices her head off)  
  
Matt- (sings) Ding dong the witch is dead!  
  
(cheers form everyone)  
  
Maximus- now what?  
  
Jonathan-dunno.  
  
(fangirls run away seeing their leader's head on the ground)  
  
Maximus- see it pays to play with sharp objects.  
  
Indy- I still like my gun though.  
  
Jonathan- I rather like my gold thing.  
  
Brendan- for the last time, IT'S A SPEAR!  
  
Jonathan- shut up! Can't I have a little glory? They made me look like a wimp in the second movie!  
  
Brendan- that's because you are.  
  
Jonathan- at least I didn't cry!  
  
Brendan- well, your wife didn't die then come back!  
  
Jonathan-no, but I got the diamond in the end!  
  
Brendan- which you're sharing with me…  
  
Jonathan- no! it's mine! MINE!  
  
Maximus- umm, do you think we should just leave them to it?  
  
Indy- yeah, come on.  
  
Ok, so there's more, but my fingers are tired, when they are no longer numb… I will update again! Bye-bye! 


	4. chapter after the one after the next cha...

Nora- (to Max) weren't you shot?  
  
Maximus- yeah, but in this notebook, Indy could chop off my head and I'd still be alive.  
  
Indy- (confused) why would I do that?  
  
Maximus- I'm making an example.  
  
Indy- oh, ok, I'm not confused anymore.  
  
Abby- yeah, hey Indy, how bout some shrimp?  
  
Indy- SHRIMP!  
  
Nora- why are you so stupid?! (Walks behind Abby) FLAT TIRE!  
  
Abby- STOP!  
  
Nora- hahaha! Flat tire! Flat tire!  
  
Abby- it's not funny!  
  
Nora- yes it is!  
  
Abby- no  
  
Nora- yes  
  
Indy- everybody's arguing  
  
Maximus-except us.  
  
Jonathan- give me back my diamond! (Throws gold stick at Brendan's head, Brendan is running around with the diamond)  
  
Brendan- oww!  
  
Jonathan- who's the wimp now, Fraiser?!  
  
Brendan- oww! (starts to cry)  
  
Jonathan- HA HAA! Now who's the star who gets everything?!  
  
Indy + Maximus- us  
  
Jonathan- beware of the EVIL FLY SWATTER OF DOOM! MUHAHAHA!  
  
Maximus- uh-oh, this guys gone nuts!  
  
Jonathan- hahahaha (starts whacking everyone in sight with fly swatter)  
  
Abby + Nora- RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY! (whack!) OW!  
  
Jonathan- got you!  
  
Brendan- sorry, he's kinda (whack!) crazy.  
  
Abby- never would've noticed! (whack!)  
  
Jonathan- I am the mega-star! I will save the day! I will fight dragons and rescue the girl! Hahahaha!  
  
Imotep- ~*~ random symbols ~*~ (every one stares at him then sees the caption in English at the bottom) hello  
  
All- ohhh, that's what he said.  
  
Brendan- umm, Imotep, what was that you said at the end of the movie?  
  
Imotep- ~*~ random symbols ~*~ (caption- I cannot say)  
  
Brendan- why?  
  
Imotep- ::oh hell just skip the random symbols:: (caption- because)  
  
Maximus- a muffler with a guy jumping a fence wearing a Red Sox hat.  
  
Jonathan- I'm so gorgeous!  
  
Commodus- I know you are but what am I?  
  
Jonathan- umm, I wasn't calling you gorgeous.  
  
Commodus- well when anyone says gorgeous I think they're talking about me!  
  
Rock(scorpion king)-I am the wrestling arachnid!  
  
Jonathan- I am Nora's best friend.  
  
Maximus- well that takes care of my job.  
  
Nora- Maximus, I love you!  
  
Maximus- and that's supposed to change my mind because…  
  
Nora- who's the one who ran off with Commodus?  
  
Maximus- well, umm…  
  
Commodus- c'mon Maxie!  
  
Nora- uh, no  
  
Abby- what's going on now?  
  
Indy- dunno.  
  
(Suddenly Boyfriend Stealer swings in)  
  
Boyfriend Stealer- (to Abby) you look like Russell Crowe.  
  
Nora- ewwwwww!  
  
Boyfriend Stealer- ooh, you're cute (points to Indy) ooh, you're cuter too! (points to Maximus) ooh and you're not bad (points to Jonathan)  
  
Jonathan- save me golden stick! (throws it at Boyfriend Stealer) leave!  
  
Boyfriend Stealer- (eats golden stick) You can't hurt me!  
  
Jonathan- My golden stick! NOOOOOOO! (Jonathan knocks BFS ::boyfriend stealer:: out) Ha! That's for my golden stick!  
  
Maximus- (to Abby) you do not look like me.  
  
Abby- I should hope not.  
  
Indy- all in favor of running away say I  
  
All- I (Imotep says a random symbol that means "I")  
  
(BFS wakes up)  
  
BFS- Not so fast! (shoots nets out of fingers)  
  
Imotep- ~*~ random symbols ~*~ (she's got special powers)  
  
BFS- what'd he say?  
  
Maximus- read the caption.  
  
BFS- oh  
  
Imotep- ~*~ same random symbols as before ~*~ (she's got special powers)  
  
BFS- you got that right Mummy Man. (looks him up and down) ooh, you're hot too!  
  
All- ewwwww!  
  
BFS- what?  
  
Nora- he's decaying-----yuck!  
  
BFS- you're not too bad yourself  
  
Nora- excuse me while I throw up (hurls)  
  
Abby- are you ok? 


	5. the randomness continues

Nora- I think so, ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww……  
  
Abby- well she said I look like Russell Crowe-----  
  
Both- ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww  
  
Maximus-What's wrong with being Russell Crowe?  
  
Indy- Nothing, let me explain (whispers explanation into his ear)  
  
Maximus-ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!  
  
Indy- tell me about it  
  
BFS- now to steal your boyfriends! Although, you two are kinda cute (Nora and Abby throw up)  
  
Maximus, Indy, Imoteb and Jonathan- ahhhhhhhh! O_o!  
  
(They all run away)  
  
Imoteb-~*~ random symbols in the shape of a hat, gun and girl~*~(Indy shoot her!)  
  
Indy-OK!  
  
Jonathan- but-but she ate my gold stick! How will shooting her get rid of her?!  
  
Brendan-Will this help? (holds up the Book of Life, from the Mummy)  
  
Jonathan-Yay!  
  
Abby-where'd that come from?  
  
Brendan- dunno, hey Imoteb! Read this for us will ya!  
  
Imoteb-~*~(you guessed it) random symbols~*~ (OK!) (takes book)  
  
BFS-Kiss of Death! (black lips shoot out from hands and land on all the boy's lips)  
  
Abby + Nora- OH NO! (Brendan, Jonathan, Max, Indy and Imotep fall to the ground twitching with the black lips on their lips)  
  
Nora- Look! Up in the sky! It's a bird, it's a plane!  
  
Abby- NO! it's Superman!  
  
Superman- Hello, I am going to save you  
  
Napoleon- I am Nap-ol-e-on!  
  
Commodus- I'm an emperor too!  
  
Napoleon-yes, but you are tall.  
  
Abby- Help? The BFS is reviving Indy!  
  
Indy- what? (farts)  
  
BFS- (kisses Indy) I love you!  
  
Abby- You B****! Get away from him! I'll kick you're a**!  
  
BFS-beep beep beepy beep (huh?) He's mine now!  
  
Indy-(in a trance) Boy friend Stealer  
  
Abby- NO! Indy snap out of it! (kisses him)  
  
Indy- what happened? YOU! (sees BFS)  
  
BFS-me! (kisses Maximus)  
  
Maximus-(in a trance) boy friend stealer…  
  
Nora- No! (kisses him)  
  
Maximus-hello  
  
BFS-NO! (kisses Jon)  
  
Jon- hey! That didn't affect me!  
  
BFS- but…… why?  
  
Jon- I don't have a girlfriend you can steal me from, I'm so unloved!  
  
Commodus- no you're not!  
  
Jon- ewwwwww!  
  
BFS-well I still have two left  
  
Brendan- Boy friend stealer…  
  
Nora- well I guess I'll have to do it…  
  
Abby-no! I'll have to do it!  
  
Nora- Me!  
  
Abby-ME!  
  
Evie- nope, me.  
  
Nora- damn, his wife's here.  
  
Abby-oh, man!  
  
(Evie smooches him and he comes out of trance)  
  
Brendan- Evie!  
  
(suddenly Paul Popowich comes in)  
  
Paul-I'm a fag!(he runs out)  
  
Brendan- ok then…  
  
Evie-Imoteb!  
  
BFS-ok, last one!  
  
Imoteb-~*~blah blah blah~*~ (boy friend stealer)  
  
All- uh-oh…  
  
Abby- really, does anyone really care if he doesn't come back?  
  
Jonathan-we can resurrect Anack-su-namun for him.  
  
Evie- who wants to?  
  
Jon- Evie! (throws her the Book of the Dead)  
  
Evie-Fine! (reads ancient Egyptian out loud and some sand comes in and forms Anack-su-namun.)  
  
(Anack-su-namun kisses Imoteb)  
  
Imoteb-~*~random symbols~*~ (WOW!)  
  
Anack-su-namun- ~*~random symbols~*~ (hello hot stuff!)  
  
BFS-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Superman-Ha Ha!, my job here is done!  
  
Indy-wait-you didn't do anything. (all the guys advance on Superman)  
  
Superman-uh, he he he, now, you don't want to do anything evil.  
  
Maximus-oh, yeah, he's right, we're the good guys.  
  
Indy-oh well (they all start beating up Superman)  
  
Superman-please stop hurting me  
  
(Maximus and Indy stab and shoot him at the same time, he dies cause Superman is really Superfag)  
  
Abby- (to Nora, Evie, and Anack-su-namun) Look at those muscles!  
  
Commodus- I know!!!!!!!!(faints)  
  
---------------ok, are we all happy now, it's been updated, now I am tired and I have to go and put on my jammies and fluffy bunny slippers. Boy, I'm always tired, anyway, you like this eh? Go read "Illegal Drugs in Middle Earth" under Matrixchick and it's almost (dare I say it?) funnier than this ::gasp::. Also for a total change in emotion read "Don't Let Me Get Me" by Periadoc. So review and make us all happy, cause all of us here at Queens of Gondor are still pissed at the Oscar results….evil, evil Beautiful Mind, we all know Lord of the Rings should have won…anyway, thank you reviewers WE LOVE YOU! 


	6. chapterbob octagonpants!!!!!!

Nora- oh dear  
  
BFS- I will get you!  
  
(Paul Popowich runs in)  
  
Paul- I'm a fag!  
  
(Commodus wakes up)  
  
Commodus- hel-lo hot stuff  
  
Paul- hel-lo gorgeous! (Superfag flies away)  
  
Commodus- wasn't he beautiful?  
  
Paul- not as beautiful as you  
  
Commodus- Aw! You're so sweet, I could eat ya! So I will (eats Paul Popowich) tastes like chicken!  
  
Indy- cause he was chicken! (rolls on the floor with laughter)  
  
Maximus- that was lame.  
  
Abby- yes it was, now what to do with the boyfriend stealer?  
  
Jon-kill her?  
  
Brendan- this should do! (whips out the book of life)  
  
Jon- what does it say?  
  
Brendan- Java java java!  
  
Jon- you want some coffee??  
  
(Brendan runs away screaming Java!)  
  
Abby- Nora's getting high on Gellyrolls.  
  
Nora-::sniffs Gellyrolls:: ooh yeah, that's the stuff  
  
Max- woah  
  
Commodus- I'm so pretty  
  
Indy- where did that come from?  
  
Commodus- just stating a fact (suddenly Jack walks in from Will and Grace)  
  
Jack- JUST JACK! Well…well…well…what do we have here? Hmmm, my gay-dar's beeping.  
  
Indy- oh my god! Another fag!  
  
Jack- hey honey! Maybe I could "change ya"  
  
Indy- ewwwww! I don't want to be gay!  
  
Commodus- I'm gay- I'm an honest to God fag.  
  
Maximus- I see queer people…  
  
Jack- well so I am I, I am so pretty!  
  
Commodus- who's the prettiest lady here?  
  
Jack- me  
  
Commodus- no me!  
  
Abby- I love science!  
  
Nora- ya only love it cause Mr. Dow just said "Indiana Jones"  
  
(Abby passes out at the sound of Indiana Jones)  
  
Indy- Abby! Are you ok?!?  
  
(Abby wakes up again)Abby- Indy! (passes out again)  
  
Max- well, Indy, at least you know she likes ya.  
  
Nora- yeah.  
  
Max- why don't you do that for me?  
  
Nora-take off your shirt. (max does) OH MY GOD! (passes out)  
  
Maximus- that's more like it.  
  
Indy- you want to get a Coke?  
  
Max- ok  
  
(They walk away)  
  
(Nora and Abby are still unconscious on the ground, along with Commodus and Jack)  
  
Maximus- shouldn't we have woken them up?  
  
Indy- yeah, but let's drink our Cokes first. (chugs Coke)  
  
Maximus- I wanted a Pepsi  
  
Indy-Coke!  
  
Maximus- Pepsi!  
  
Indy- Coke was around longer!  
  
Maximus- so? Your point?  
  
Indy- I have been defeated.  
  
Maximus- Gawd, it's just a Coke.  
  
Indy-to you, but to me it's a Great American past time.  
  
Maximus- now you're just freaking me out  
  
Indy- whatever (crashes can on head)  
  
Maximus-hey! I wanna try that! (bashes head on can) ow! Forget this! (steps on it)  
  
Indy-::sings:: I'm better than you-oo, na-na-na-na-na-na, never mind, let's go and wake 'em up.  
  
Maximus- alright, alright (gives Indy a flat tire) Nora taught me that!  
  
Indy- whatever (starts grumbling)  
  
Maximus- Wake up! (they both throw water on them)  
  
Abby-(still out of it) I'm drowning! I'm drowning!  
  
Indy- (shakes her) wake up!  
  
Abby-hello  
  
Nora- hi  
  
Abby- Indy (catches her breath)  
  
Nora- woah (catches her breath too)  
  
Maximus- ok then  
  
Nora- alright alright!  
  
Indy- Indiator!  
  
Maximus- Gladiana!  
  
Indy-yup, I can see a screenplay.  
  
Maximus- yeah, but who'd be the main character?  
  
Indy- Me! And there'd be lavender ponies  
  
Maximus- oh man, on my signal, unleash hell.  
  
Nora- what was that for?  
  
Maximus- I dunno, I just like saying that line  
  
Nora- ok  
  
Indy- ::sings:: Lavender ponies!  
  
Maximus- no, please!  
  
Indy- why not?  
  
Maximus- (to Nora) and he's supposed to be an action hero…  
  
Indy- I heard that! ::sings again:: lavender ponies ::stops:: lavender ponies will be the main theme sung to my theme, of course!  
  
Maximus- hey! I never agreed to that!  
  
Steven Spielberg- sounds good to me!  
  
Maximus- I drink lithium 7UP! WOOO HOOO!  
  
Indy- oh, that's why he's insane…  
  
Nora- insanely hot!  
  
Abby- they're both high ::joins Indy in the lavender ponies song::  
  
Nora- oh dear god  
  
Sean Connery- I am Sean Connery and Indy's father.  
  
Indy- dad…….could you leave please, I'm with my friends…  
  
Sean- c'mon son, I wanna have a real hootenanny!  
  
Indy-oh man ::blushes::  
  
Sean- I know how to do all that "Hip-hop" you kids like, look! (attempts at a Macerana)  
  
Maximus- SHIELD YOUR EYES!  
  
(Sean stops dancing and looks at Indy)  
  
Sean- son, why does he wear a skirt? Does he have a "partner"  
  
Indy-(mumbles) not this again.  
  
Maximus- what? Me?  
  
Sean- you're the only one with a skirt, fruit  
  
Maximus- hey! I'm very manly! I'm a Gladiator!  
  
Sean-(mutters) fruit  
  
(Commodus runs in)  
  
Commodus- fruit? Who's a fruit?  
  
(Sean points at Maximus)  
  
Commodus-I'll get to you later……Maximus, I knew you loved me!  
  
Maximus- Nooo! I'm not a fruit! Why do you keep showing up?!  
  
Commodus- I love you!  
  
Maximus- I'll show you all that I'm not a fruit! (kisses Nora)  
  
Nora- wow! Hehehe  
  
Maximus-see! That was awesome!  
  
Commodus- oh Maximus I need you!  
  
Maximus- I don't give a damn.  
  
Commodus- ouch  
  
Sean- son, did you tell that Abby that you liked her, you're always saying she's soo cute.  
  
Indy-(blushing) Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.  
  
Abby-Mr. Connery, I can take a hint.  
  
Sean- but Indy, you're always talking about her.  
  
Indy- shut-up!  
  
Sean-did you take your earache medicine today? Cause I don't think you did.  
  
Indy-(getting red) yes! I took my medicine and Abby knows I like her….and hasn't Bingo started!  
  
Sean-(checking his watch) so it is…(runs away)  
  
Indy-finally  
  
Maximus- Indy, I'm sooooooo sorry, but it was really funny (starts giggling)  
  
(Indy gets very embarrassed)  
  
Abby-Indy, calm down, it's bad for your ears honey.  
  
(Now Max is crying he's laughing so hard)  
  
Nora-Maximus, that's not very nice.  
  
Maximus-::gasping:: I…..know…….but it's sooo funny!  
  
Nora- I know, but it's not nice.  
  
Maximus- ok, I'm calm……..no, wait(bursts out laughing)  
  
(Nora rolls her eyes)  
  
Abby-can't you control him? Jeez!  
  
Nora-I'm sorry.  
  
Sean- look son! I won a banana!  
  
Indy-AhHhHhHh! (Runs away)  
  
Sean-was it something I said?  
  
Abby- excuse me, I've got to a runaway boyfriend. That's the third time this week  
  
Sean- so they do like each other!  
  
Abby- ugh…. (Goes to find Indy)  
  
Sean- hey fruit! Want a fruit (holds out banana)  
  
Maximus- (gasping) no thanks HAHAHA!  
  
Sean- what's so funny?  
  
Maximus- N-n-nothing (now he's bent over laughing)  
  
Indy- I'm back is he gone? Oh damn!  
  
Sean-::sings:: I won a banana it rhymes with Indiana  
  
Indy- help! You guys are so luck that your dad's not here Maximus  
  
Maximus- ha ha ha ha, I know I'm lucky ^_^  
  
Ummm, now my insane, wacko friend is talking to me on the phone and wants to read it NOW so this is it for the moment. I love Mike Wazowski! yes that was random, and Randal and Sully are kick ass monsters too! Hahahahahahaha! Bye then, pray for Harry Potter book 5, and if you would like to go and invade J.K. Rowling's house to get, tell us when you're going…we love reviewers! Love love love love 'em, just like the Domino's chicken wings. Hehe sugar high! 


	7. and you thought the insaneness was over....

(Suddenly someone is standing in the doorway; he looks a lot like Indy)  
  
Indy-oh, no, oh no no no no no no no  
  
Abby- Whozat?  
  
Indy-::shaking:: that's my evil twin…  
  
Abby- ooh, what's his name?  
  
Indy- Connecticut…  
  
Maximus- gee, is your whole family the USA?  
  
Connecticut- I am Connecticut Jones!  
  
Nora- woah, did you know he had a brother?  
  
Abby-no  
  
Nora-well, now there's two  
  
Indy-::sighs:: no, there's one more, Montana, he's a lot better than Connecticut  
  
Nora- ooh dear, is your uncle Nevada Jones?  
  
Indy- yes, why?  
  
Nora- never mind  
  
Maximus- I know you got your name from your dog, what's up with your brothers?  
  
Indy- my real name is Henry, Connie's is Dave, and Montana's is Frank. Connecticut was our goldfish, and Montana was our parakeet.  
  
Maximus- oh my…  
  
Nora- you have a very messed up family  
  
Indy- tell me about it! That's why I live in Boston, not back out in Utah.  
  
Maximus- what's back in Utah?  
  
Indy- Connecticut, Montana, Nevada, Alaska, Hawaii, Georgia…I have more, Idaho, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Vermont, Maine, Pennsylvania, New York, New Jersey… (Indy goes on to name all of the states)  
  
Maximus- sorry I asked  
  
Connecticut- I wanna be better than you! I'm going to go to Egypt and raise up a dead mummy!  
  
Jonathan- hey! That's my movie!  
  
Connecticut- damn! Fine! I'll be a Gladiator and kill the Emperor!  
  
Maximus- that's been taken  
  
Connecticut- ok then! What can I do?!  
  
Maximus- you could leave.  
  
Indy- yeah, that'd be a start  
  
Maximus- hey Connecticut, why don't you find a new state, like Rome…..wait no, that's a city in Italy, and I'm from Rome, go to Iceland.  
  
Connecticut- hummmmmm (runs to Iceland)  
  
Abby- hey Nora, technically, you can't "run" to Iceland, it's across the water.  
  
Nora- someone should tell him that  
  
Maximus- he'll figure it out  
  
---SPLASH---  
  
Indy- oh well, I guess he didn't figure it out.  
  
Sean- here son! Take my banana for the trip (throws the banana and hits Connecticut on the head)  
  
Connecticut- nobody told me you couldn't run to Iceland, hey a banana! Thanks dad!  
  
Maximus- oh my god…  
  
(Sean hits Max)  
  
Sean- that's for blasphemy  
  
Maximus- owww!  
  
Sean- god, be brave will ya?  
  
(Maximus hit Sean)  
  
Maximus- who's the monkey now?  
  
Sean- ouch. Don't get fresh with me dress boy!  
  
Abby- like father, like son  
  
Maximus- don't start a fight old man!  
  
Sean- oh, I hate sour fruit! ::sings:: dancing queen!  
  
Commodus-::joins Sean:: young and sweet only 17!  
  
Jonathan-::sings with the two:; oh yeah!  
  
Commodus-::all singing has stopped:: I love that song!  
  
Sean- me too! Look more fruit! (sees Jack)  
  
Jack- hello, hello, ooooooooh, hello! (sees Sean)  
  
Sean- Jack, I won a banana  
  
Jack- ooh, could I have your banana?  
  
Sean- sure, ::gives him banana:: did you know that I was named sexiest senior?  
  
Jack- I could figure  
  
Max and Indy- FRUIT!  
  
Jack- well, your son, Indy, right? Well, he had to get his looks from somewhere!  
  
Sean-son, you've got dirt on your forehead ::spits on Indy's face::  
  
Indy- daaaaaaaaaaaad!  
  
Parker- ::in a really whiney voice:: I'm Parker  
  
Abby- oh no  
  
Parker- Preston never calls….  
  
Commodus- ooh, who's that?  
  
Abby-um, nobody! Stick with Jack  
  
Parker- Parker wants a pelican  
  
Maximus- um, good for you  
  
Parker- tha-a-a-ank you!  
  
Indy- Abby, is that your da------  
  
Abby- yeah, did your dad always spit on your face?  
  
Indy- no  
  
Nora- all right then, why did he spit on your face?  
  
Indy- dunno  
  
Parker- bye-bye (walks off)  
  
Indy- ya, weird  
  
Nora-::cough:: spin off of the Emperor's New Groove ::cough::  
  
Indy- squeak, squeak, squeaky, squeak, that means: did you take my acorn?  
  
Parker- where's my pelican? PELICAN!(runs around room)  
  
Abby- DAD!  
  
Parker- did Parker do some thing wrong?  
  
Maximus- ::squinting:: is that Sting?  
  
Sting- ::sings:: Desert Rose, aliah aliah  
  
Nora- hi daddy!  
  
Paul (who is Sting)- I look like Sting!  
  
Tom (who is Parker)- I think I'm ok now  
  
Abby and Nora-LEAVE NOW!  
  
Maximus- this is getting ugly  
  
Indy-yeah  
  
Tom- look! Some guy in a toga!  
  
Max-::mutters:: at least he didn't say dress  
  
Tom- no, wait, it's a dress  
  
Maximus- d'oh!  
  
Maximus senior- Son!  
  
Maximus-no no no no no!  
  
Abby, Indy, Nora, and Maximus- AhHhHhHhH!!  
  
Sean- look! I've won another banana!  
  
Indy- ahhhh (blushes really red)  
  
Tom- oh no, I feel a Parker  
  
Abby- AAHHHHHH! (runs into a corner to hide)  
  
Paul- I like Rudy  
  
Nora- oh no, God no! (runs away)  
  
Sean- LOOK SON! A WHOLE TRUCKLOAD OF BANANAS!  
  
Maximus- NO MORE FRUIT SEAN!  
  
Tom- the Parker moment has passed  
  
Abby- good! Now leave!  
  
Maximus senior- you have a stain on your skirt son  
  
Maximus- daaaaaaaad!  
  
Maximus senior- that's ok, I got you a new one from the Speedy Roman!  
  
Maximus- the what?  
  
Maximus Sr.- The dry cleaners!  
  
(Maximus groans and shakes his head)  
  
all (minus parents)- LEAVE!  
  
Parents- WHY!?  
  
Kids-BECAUSE!  
  
Parents- BECAUSE WHY?  
  
Kids-BECAUSE BECAUSE!  
  
Nora- oh god oh god oh god oh god!  
  
Indy- all in favor of running say "I"  
  
All- I  
  
Maximus- Abby, does your dad always do that?  
  
Abby- yes ::mutters to self::  
  
Nora- now it is time to run for our lives  
  
Indy- agreed  
  
(Maximus whistles and a chariot pulls up)  
  
Indy- I made a new song  
  
Maximus-get in and tell us  
  
Indy-ok (gets in) ready?  
  
Maximus- yup  
  
Indy- ::sings:: oh I like to eat potato with butter on the top, and when I eat potato, I never wanna stop!  
  
Nora- um, ok then  
  
Abby- now stop  
  
Maximus- SILVER PUNCH BUGGY! NO PUNCH BACK! AH HA HA HA HA!  
  
Nora- Stop! Where are we going?  
  
Maximus- I don't know  
  
Indy- we're going underwater. Why?  
  
Maximus- I don't know  
  
Abby- you're going to KILL US ALL!  
  
Maximus- oh yeah  
  
Nora- where are we going?  
  
(they resurface inside a building)  
  
(suddenly some creatures run by yelling)  
  
creatures- Floop's a mad man, help us, save us!  
  
Abby- noooooooooooooo!  
  
Maximus- pig intestines!  
  
Timmy- Tim-may!  
  
Abby- I don't breath like that!  
  
Nora-::breathing like Darth Vader:: yes you do  
  
Darth Vader- hey that's sounds like me!  
  
Maximus- oh no! who the hell are you!?  
  
Vader- Luke, I am your father it's true…  
  
Maximus- um, who's Luke?  
  
Luke-ME! I challenge you to a light saber fight!  
  
Abby- oh no! someone call George Lucas!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
he he, well now you've got to ask yourself one question, can you handle the randomness? Well, do ya', punk? Yay! I am glad you can! Remember review like wild chipmunks on parade! Adios, for now me amigos! 


	8. and when you thought it was done.......

Han Solo-Luke, wait! (spots Indy) huh?  
  
Indy + Han- that's me! No, wait, I'm me!  
  
Nora- this is getting god damned ridiculous  
  
Maximus- how right you are  
  
Harrison Ford- woah, why am I yelling at me?  
  
Abby- oh my GOD! (faints)  
  
Paramedic- she's suffering from "hot guy overload"  
  
Harrison- where did you come from  
  
Paramedic- I dunno (leaves)  
  
Indy- (sees Harrison) hey who are you! And what happened to my girlfriend?  
  
Harrison-I'm Harrison Ford, and I played Indiana Jones and I played Han Solo. I don't know what's going on here  
  
Indy- but I AM INDIANA JONES!  
  
Han- calm down whip guy  
  
Indy- shut up futuristic boy!  
  
Maximus- um, I'm confused, will you explain this to me?  
  
Nora- this is beyond comprehension, sorry, I'm confused too  
  
Indy- take that! (whips Han)  
  
Han- oh yeah! (fires gun)  
  
Harrison- I could burn the scripts……..(holds both the Star Wars and the Indiana Jones screenplays over a small fire)  
  
(Han and Indy stop their fistfight)  
  
both- NO!  
  
Harrison- I'm gonna do it, and if I do, you guys won't exist anymore!!!! HAAAAAHAHAAAHAHA!  
  
Nora- he's mad!  
  
Maximus- he's insane!  
  
(Abby wakes up)  
  
Abby-DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (leaps on Harrison and starts pounding his head, Star Wars falls accidentally into the fire)  
  
Han-hey wait, I'm still here, oh yeah! I'm in all the movies!  
  
(Harrison is k-o on the floor)  
  
Abby- I'll kill you before you kill the handsomeness!  
  
(suddenly Han starts dissolving)  
  
Han- AhHhHhHhH!  
  
Indy- too bad  
  
Abby- nooooooooooo!  
  
Nora- oooooooook  
  
Maximus- woah, that's gonna leave a scar  
  
Abby- wait! Get Stephen Spielberg to print out a new script!  
  
Stephen- way ahead of ya! (holds up a brand new Star Wars script)  
  
(Han comes back)  
  
Indy- GO AWAY!  
  
Han-no, why should I?  
  
Indy- cause I'll KILL YOU!  
  
(Abby faints again)  
  
Jimmy- hi, I'm Jimmy Fallon  
  
Nora- Jimmy Fallon? (faints)  
  
Jimmy- is she ok? I mean I know I'm incredibly hot, but…  
  
Maximus- she's fine ::scowls::  
  
Indy- did anybody hear what I said to Mr. Badhaircut? I said, I'm gonna KILL HIM!  
  
Jimmy- we heard you the first time  
  
Indy-good (pulls out gun)  
  
Han- not so fast! (pulls out ray gun)  
  
Indy- Danger is my middle name! (whips ray gun out of Han's hand)  
  
Han- no, Clancy is your middle name.  
  
Indy- no it's not  
  
Han-yes it is  
  
Indy- no!  
  
Han- YES!  
  
Abby- oh dear god!  
  
(Voice from sky)-yes?  
  
Abby-I'm sorry, it's just and expression  
  
(voice)-that's blasphemy!  
  
(Sean slaps her)  
  
Abby- ow!  
  
Sean- you deserved it!  
  
(voice)-ok, bye  
  
Sean-bye!  
  
Nora- that's was weird  
  
Maximus- only slightly  
  
Indy- ok then  
  
Jimmy- why am I here? And where is here?  
  
Indy- you're here because some brilliant writers put you here  
  
Maximus- yes, and we still haven't figured out why or where this is  
  
Nora- Abby's blind!  
  
Abby- shut up!  
  
Imotep- ~*~return of the random symbols~*~ (I'm here to kill you)  
  
Indy- wait wasn't Imotep a good guy?  
  
Imotep- ~*~random symbols~*~(yeah, but that was a trick) MUHAHAHAHA!  
  
Maximus- hey! Nice evil laugh!  
  
Imotep- ~*~random symbols~*~ (thank you)  
  
Nora- shouldn't we be running?  
  
Jonathan-capitol idea chap! (runs away)  
  
Indy- oh aren't we bright  
  
(Jon hit's him with fly swatter)  
  
Jonathan- shut up you old fart!  
  
Indy- I'll show you old fart! (starts strangling him)  
  
Jonathan- ::gag:: stop ::gag:: I'm ::gag, splutter, cough:: sorry!  
  
Indy-(let's go of him) that's better  
  
(Imotep is running around with Jon's gold stick)  
  
Jon-hey! My gold stick!(Imotep makes it into a spear) oh, you were right! It was a spear…RUN!!!!!!!!  
  
Maximus- how'd he do that!?  
  
Nora- never mind! Just run!  
  
(suddenly Scorpion King appears)  
  
Scorpion King- ~*~random symbols~*~ (you wish to fight me?)  
  
Imotep-~*~random symbols~*~(yeah!)  
  
Indy- oh my g-------------(Abby slaps her hand over Indy's mouth)  
  
Abby- don't say g-o-d, some weird voice comes down from the sky!  
  
Indy- um, ok. Oh my goodness!  
  
Abby- now that sounds stupid  
  
Maximus-girly, just like your underwear, Indy  
  
Indy- I'd rather wear my underwear than a skirt  
  
Maximus-hey! Other men's blood has been on this thing!  
  
Nora-ewwwwww!  
  
Indy- yeah, well mine has gone through tumble dry!  
  
Nicole- I look like Justin!  
  
Nora- yes, yes you do  
  
Nicole-dirty pop, baby, baby you can't stop, pop, pop, pop  
  
Jimmy-ok, now for talent: Spring break, last year, went out bought beer, cashier grabbed me, took my fake ID, wait a second man, you don't understand, that picture is me, with a turban and a tan, my, my, my, my, ma- my my, my, my, ma-my name's Mohamed  
  
Imotep-~*~symbols of his head exploding~*~  
  
Abby-NAVY BLUE PUNCH BUGGY. NO PUNCH BACK!!!!!!!  
  
Nora-shut up!  
  
Abby-nun-uh!  
  
Boyfriend stealer-I'M BACK! MUHAHAHA!  
  
All-AhHhHhH!  
  
Nora-hey Abby, have you seen my mummy pen?  
  
Abby-no did you leave it at my house?  
  
Imotep-~*~random mummy symbol~*~ (I'm the mummy!)  
  
Nora-yes, you are, but, I dunno, I might've  
  
Abby-I'll look for it ok?  
  
Indy-um, we've got bigger problems than pens….it's the Boyfriend Stealer!  
  
Boyfriend Stealer-HAHA! Now I have a sidekick! The Annoying One!  
  
Annoying One-HAHA!  
  
Abby-oh no, the Annoying One!  
  
Nora-not that!  
  
Annoying One-I like to diss other guys and be really annoying!  
  
All-AHHHHHHHHHHHH!  
  
Boyfriend Stealer-that's right, while I steal your boyfriends, she'll talk to you about ugly guys on PAX TV!  
  
Annoying One-that's right! Hey, wait, they're not ugly!  
  
BFS-(pulls out whip)HAHA!(snatches Indy and Maximus) I'll get you!  
  
Indy and Max-NOOOOOOOO!  
  
Max- ok, (whispers to Indy) here's the plan, we talk about how much we love Nora and Abby. That might make her weaker!  
  
Indy-Good idea!  
  
Max-I'm full of them  
  
Indy-Abby is the most beyoooooootiful girl in the world!  
  
Maximus-I loooooove Nora, she's soo gorgeous!  
  
BFS-ahhh! Stop! Stop!  
  
Indy-Abby looooves Lavender Ponies and so do I!  
  
BFS-::blinks:: ok that was messed up!  
  
Maximus-I'm gonna have to agree with the freak, Indy  
  
::Meanwhile::  
  
Abby-Stop! Please! Stop!  
  
Annoying One- Paul Popowitch is hot, but I don't know how to spell his name!  
  
Nora-wait! Can you hear Indy and Maximus!?  
  
Abby-::looking disgusted:: yeah, and did he just say I loved Lavender Ponies?  
  
Nora- never mind that, they're destroying the Boyfriend Stealer  
  
Abby-yay!  
  
Annoying One-I love Paul Popowitch!  
  
Nora-how do we destroy the Annoying One?  
  
Abby- talk about how hot Indy and Maximus are  
  
Nora- ::sarcasm:: ooh, that'll be a challenge…  
  
Abby-ooh the way Indy tips his hat to the side is soooooooooo adorable!  
  
Nora- I love Max's skirt  
  
AO-that was messed up  
  
Abby-cant you think of anything more manly?  
  
Nora-well, he did kill a lot of people, and that was manly!  
  
AO-AHHHHH no more other people!!!  
  
Abby-what other people?  
  
Goth TK-Smack the Batpig! You destroy me!  
  
Nora- hi Goth TK!  
  
GTK-you got any pins?  
  
Nora-uh no  
  
(Abby starts laughing)  
  
Abby- aha! Can I get a diet Coke!?  
  
Nora-I love Fruit Loops ever so much!  
  
(Abby and Nora suddenly start cracking up)  
  
Abby- I'm blind!  
  
Nora-stop smiling!  
  
Abby-I can see!  
  
GTK-it destroys me!  
  
Nora-what does?  
  
GTK-everything, black is the colour of my soul  
  
Abby-HEY! I found nails!  
  
GTK-give them to me damn it!  
  
Jon- would you like my golden stick?  
  
GTK-mmm, looks tempting…..  
  
Jon-I have a wedgie  
  
Nora-that's fantastic  
  
Abby-where'd you get your golden stick, I thought BFS ate it  
  
Jon- I found it in her cave  
  
Indy-that means she crapped it out  
  
All-Ewww  
  
Maximus-did you wash it?  
  
Jon-yeah…..why?  
  
Nora- oh thank GO- um, er, GOSH!  
  
ClergyWoman- I AM CLERGYWOMAN!  
  
Abby-who?  
  
ClergyWoman-CLERGYWOMAN!  
  
Nora-um, ok  
  
Annoying One-AhHhHhHh!  
  
Indy-what?  
  
ClergyWoman-I will make you nuns!  
  
All-noooooooooooooo!  
  
Nora-I have goosies!  
  
Church Lady-that is against EVERYTHING!  
  
Nora-don't tell Sean  
  
Abby-yeah, he'll smack ya  
  
Indy- yup  
  
Adam Sandler- you can do it! Cut his freaking balls off!  
  
Maximus-uh, k….  
  
ClergyWoman-AHHHH! NO BALLS!  
  
Church Lady-Isn't that special!  
  
--------------------------------the Film Stops Rolling---------------------- ----------------  
  
Stephen Spielberg- Abby, Nora, what the hell? Bubbles? Gawd!  
  
Nora-what? I thought it was a nice touch…  
  
Harrison-Uh, how was a 3 people at one time?  
  
Stephen-actually, I thought it was a pretty good performance  
  
Russell Crowe-anybody want some coffee?  
  
Brendan-Java, java, java, oh yeah!  
  
Abby- you gotta lay off the java, hon  
  
Brendan-ok  
  
Stephen-so, I like your work ladies  
  
Abby+Nora-thanks!  
  
(they all sign a contract, and now all the guys in the story are trademarks, even if they already were)  
  
The End!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
FINALLY! It's done! Yay! Yay! Yay! Yay! I AM SO HAPPY! I FEEL LIKE SINGING! But I won't cause there are people in the room with me. Anyway it was fun, there is more and there will be a sequel and I know you all will be happy! Well anyway today is a happy happy day and I like potatoes! Hurrah! Yippee! (somebody, please tell me when to stop) thank you anyway, please REVIEW! REVIEW OR I WILL FIND YOU AND FORCE YOU TO READ THIS DAY AFTER DAY, HOUR AFTER HOUR, AND THEN YOU'D TURN OUT LIKE US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HAHAHAHAHAHA sorry, I was home sick today and my head is full of Tylenol, crème soda, and Monty Python…..bye then ^_^ 


	9. AND YOU THOUGHT WE WERE GONE! you were w...

A/N- hey, what's up, it's been awhile since I've been able to just sit and type up the rest of this stuff...oh yeah! I remember! A disclaimer. We own just about nothing in this story, well, except for the stuff that we do, you'll recognize those people, and I'll give you a big 'ol hint to those people ::cough, Abby, Nora, BoyFriend Stealer, cough:: Now on with the story! Oh and by the by, you really should read "The Notebook" first to get this, cause if you don't, man oh man will you be lost..don't say I didn't warn you. ::Sorry Meg Ryan, Nora made me do it:: THE RETURN OF THE NOTEBOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
(They are at the beach when suddenly Meg Ryan appears) Meg- Russell Russell! I'm here! Nora-Russ who's that? Russell- uh-oh, it's Meg Ryan, she thinks I dated her. Abby- uh-oh Nora-she's going to die. Indy-should I shoot her? Nora-this time it's personal. DIE!!!!!!!!!! Indy-oh god. (Nora runs screaming at Meg Ryan) Russell-Take my sword! (throws it to Nora) Nora-thanks baby! (Slashes Meg across the face) Meg-ouch! What are you doing with my Russell? Nora-(red in her eyes) what did you just say? Meg-I said, Russell is mine. Nora-DIE YOU B****! (slices off her head) Abby- calm down, she's dead. Nora-rage falling, falling, RISING, falling. gone Maximus(he happens to be Russell, but times change, I told you! Read "The Notebook)-Good! Kiss me! Nora-with pleasure honey! (SMOOCH!) Indy-I'm becoming popular again. Abby-but you were always popular, honey! Indy- Good! ---------------------------Film stops rolling-------------------------------  
  
Spielberg- you know, you don't have to do the stuff Nora-k  
  
Girlfriend Stealer- I'm David Duchovany, I can't spell my own name, but I am known as the Girlfriend Stealer, and this is my sidekick, Lubricant Man. Indy- not another thing like Boyfriend Stealer! ::smacks his head:: Maximus- who the hell is writing this?! Nora- never mind, you hottie! Jerry Sienfeld- who did Indiana Jones fight other than snakes? All- naaa- Jerry-Naaa-zis All- Nazis! Indy- (raises hand) I was going to say Nazis. Jerry- and where were they from----wait aren't you Indiana Jones? Indy- (Looks at Abby) yeah, yes I am. Abby- oh yes, yes you are. I'm starting to think you're a little slow. Indy- really? Jerry- (Touches him on the shoulder) There now, we are all slow. Indy- (In a high voice) Abby, he's touching me in my special area. Abby- Help him! Help him! Nora- (looks at Maximus) uh, are you sure they put on enough sunscreen? Maximus-what? I'm going for a swim, wanna come? Nora-yes, a million times yes! ::drools:: (Slowly he starts taking off his shirt slowly) ooh, I want, I want, I HAVE! (Max successfully manages to take off his shirt) Indy- good idea! (starts to remove his shirt, pulls it over his head, but it gets stuck) help! Help! Abby- here, (pulls shirt off) (Indy's hair is poofed up) Abby- yup, that's my man alright. Max-(slaps his head) are you coming? All-yes! Jerry-(Starts taking off shirt.shirt is off, reveals really nasty, hairy chest) GFS(Girlfriend Stealer)-y'know, I'm still here. Indy-oh, yeah Max-right, you should die. Indy-(waving arms in the air) oh shit, we're gonna die! (runs into a grove of trees and starts screaming) Abby- gosh! What's wrong? GFS-I have absolutely no idea. Max-wasn't someone going to kill him? (points to GFS) Indy- oh shit! Max- What?! For the last time! Indy- I just like that word, shit shit shit shit! Lubricant Man-boss, are you gonna steal these guys girlfriends? GFS-oh yeah, (Starts to wave his arms and pink sparkly dust falls on Abby and Nora) Abby-(dazed) pretty Nora-(dazed)ooh Indy-Abby! NO! Max-Nora! (turns to GFS) what have you done to them?! GFS-I.I don't know really, I just bought this stuff today. Indy-(shaking Abby) Come back! It's my birthday! Abby-oooh(dazed) Nora-hummmm(eyes closed)  
  
~*~As always..my fingers are tired, that's all you get now my friends...::laughs evily:: ok well, as my friend Tigger says, "TTFN! Ta ta for now!" Oreo's call! REVIEW FOR YOUR LIVES! 


	10. To sort out any confusion...

Ok, this is for all you people who have read The Notebook and are still trying to figure out who the hell everyone is and where they are from.fear not! This list will make everything (hopefully) clear:  
  
Abby: Co writer Nora: Co writer Indy: The one and only Indiana Jones! Maximus: That guy from Galdiator, you know played by Russell Crowe Commodus: The bad guy from Galdiator, you know Joaquin Phoenix Joe: The blue haired dude from Digimon (anime) Izzy: The short guy from Digimon Yolei: Purple haired girl from Digimon season 2 Mimi: The pink girl from Digimon Hermione: The smart girl from Harry Potter Harry: If you don't know who he is.you deserve to die Malfoy: The icky blonde kid from Harry Potter Ron: The red haired kid from Harry Potter Rudy: The old guy from Survivor 1 (you know the reality show) Jerry: Icky girl from Survivor 2 Richard: The guy that won Survivor 1 Brendan Fraser: That was self explanatory Jonathan: The funny guy from the Mummy, Evie's brother Imoteb: (still can't spell his name) the actual mummy from The Mummy Gore: Al Gore the guy that lost the presidential election Weakest Link person: Self explanatory Matt: The hot blonde from Digimon Jun: That girl from Digimon who everyone hates The Rock: Wrestling dude Boyfriend Stealer: Original character Superman: Duh Napoleon: French guy, he was short Evie: the girl from The Mummy Paul Popowich: Some guy from PAX tv Anack-Su-Namun: The girl Imoteb was in love with Jack: The gay guy from Will and Grace Steven Spielburg: You should know him. Sean Connery: Scottish actor Parker: Original character, Abby's dad Sting: Original character, Nora's dad Luke: The original star wars guy Han Solo: Other guy from Star Wars, played by Harrison Ford Jimmy Fallon: That really hott guy from Saturday Night Live Nicole: Original character Annoying One: Original character Goth TK: He originally came from TK who was from Digimon. The people at the Los Temple of Ishda created him Clergy Woman: Original character Church Lady: Dana Carvey from Saturday Night Live Girl Friend Stealer: David Duchovany (spell check?) Lubricant Man: Orlando Jones Jerry Seinfeld: Comedian 


End file.
